Hi everyone! 

July is coming to an end, so please enjoy our final major update — our 2 final CGS. There is one of each boy, and we really hope you enjoy them! Go check them out <3 
There are also a few minor fixes, but if you have the latest version and spot any more, please feel free to let us know.

With update news out of the way, and this project officially coming to an end, I thought I'd finally put down some thoughts and thanks to the team: 

I don't even know where to begin on what a crazy and transformative few months it's been.
What I can say is that I came into this jam as an anxious and awkward bundle of energy. I am absolutely STILL an anxious and awkward bundle of energy... maybe more now, so buckle in! 
Grab some tea, maybe a snack, and prepare yourself for the ravings of a dev on the edge of losing their sanity.

I guess I should start at the beginning, a year and a half ago, when a concept for an otome came to me in a dream and led me onto this path. I wanted to learn; I didn't want to dive right into my own project knowing nothing, so I gained some experience working on other projects until I eventually found myself writing a recruitment doc and pressing send on messages to discord servers before I could come to my senses... and that's the short version of how I made it here. As I'm sure many people relate, anxiety and social anxiety have plagued me for the longest time. I've grown a lot even in the past year and a half, but even coming into this jam, I was a little bit of a nervous wreck. 

Once more... Aramis and Kujo had come to me in a dream, begging to be released from the confines of my grey matter and immortalised forever in prose and pixels. Yes, I dream of animal folk, because I'm obsessed with them... especially bunnies. I mean, I made it part of my own identity too... But with this dream, I had a vision, a better idea of what I was doing... and yet still a fuck ton of anxiety. 

If there's one persistent theme of my experience with Otome Jam, it's that. Anxiety. Worrying over every little thing. Is my writing good enough? Am I good enough? Am I being a good director or a good teammate? Was it okay to give feedback there? Why can't I stop saying sorry? I'm still convinced every member of my team secretly hates me, I'm wishing I could fix all the dumb mistakes I've made or moments of forgetfulness.

Yet somehow that anxiety fuelled... this. A creation I'm incredibly proud of.

It is a blessing and a curse (though definitely more of a blessing) to feel like the least talented member of a team - but I truly am blown away by the talent and kindness shown to me by my lovely team members. 

I suppose I should start with Demus - who is the Lead Artist for the game and responsible for making the characters such a blessing to look at. I mean... look at that art? Demus rooted for me from the start and even helped me overcome initial stumbles - bringing professionalism and talent that is astounding, and also just being a real sweetheart. Thank you for making these characters a reality, and such a beautiful one at that.  Sorry for the fact that when you send me art all I can seem to do is blush and fangirl like a weirdo. 

On the art front, we also have the lovely Cynn. They're so sweet and so talented putting together a GUI design that I truly think is one of the best I've seen in otome, and I know I'm biased but the theme, the execution? It's immaculate. It was all I wanted and dreamed of and more. Their work adds so much polish to this project it's not even fair. If you weren't already aware, Cynn was also on several other projects for Otome Jam and killed it on every other one too, which is just... incredible work ethic. 

Speaking of polish — We have amazing editors. They didn't look at this, which is why it's such a mess... sorry.

Shar came to the project first, and I was impressed because they sent me a freaking LinkedIn profile as part of the recruitment, and I knew then I was dealing with someone professional and cool (and also I had to make a LinkedIn profile to view it, rip). They're a constant hype and support, and the editing notes they've given me have improved my writing tenfold... though there's only so much they can save my writing, let's be real. Alongside amazingly helpful constructive comments, we're some absolute hilarious gems of comments and humour I treasure, and totally need to share with everyone. 

Demi is another one of our fantastic editors, though she mainly worked alongside Jane. Despite not working super closely, her talent shines so brightly, as she's also excellent at what she does. I cannot stress the importance of having someone like Demi on a project who can add so much polish to what you create. Also, she always has amazing Discord profile pictures. 

Quill is the coder/scripter for the game, and I cannot thank them enough for their hard work, dedication, and ability to put up with streams of my nonsensical and frankly annoying questions. They're the unsung hero of the game, as most coders are, putting together so much that doesn't get seen or celebrated as much. Undoubtedly this game wouldn't be what it is without Quill, as it would've never made it off the ground. Again, I can't thank them enough for their hard work and patience on this project. 

Touma blew me away with their musical talent. I think all musicians are magicians, I'm not gonna lie. Touma took my brief and just ran with it, putting out amazing track after amazing track and just being very chill about it all. Each track is fantastic and will keep you company throughout the whole game, I hope you love their work here as much as I do.

Xiael is another unsung hero. UI programming is something I could never do even if I was locked in a room with nothing to do but learn Renpy. Once more, they've put up with annoying requests and messages from me and taken it in stride, simply getting on with what they need to do and doing it well and with ease. A piece of our code broke just before launch, and they stayed up til 3AM helping solve it, ahh. 

On to voices... The VAs were actually largely chosen by a vote in the server. It's fair to see everyone fell in love with Cory's Aramis audition straight away because he ran away with the vote. Cory is the perfect Aramis, having such a lovely voice and delivery, and just being amazingly talented. I spent half of our recording sessions with a raised brow of "holy shit, that's exactly how I heard it in my head"... all on the first take. On the rare occasion that the first take wasn't quite right, Cory seemed so clued into his own performance he could pre-empt my comments before I would even speak. Anyway, I spent the rest often being swept up in the emotions of the delivery. I think his performance is a real treat. Thank you for your talent, and for relenting and laughing at my jokes. 

Zack also nailed the audition so hard, that it was kinda unreal. While voice actors obviously love to do voices and well... act... Kujo's voice is a little different from Zach's and definitely meant effort on his part to be Kujo. I was constantly struck by how effortlessly he could switch from Zack voice, bubbly personality to Kujo voice, so aloof. Zack brought so much energy too that put me at ease with all of my first-time voice directing nerves too. He's also a capital P Perfectionist, so nailed many takes and went above and beyond. Kujo and Zach intersect with getting flustered with flirtation. I have nothing but admiration for both VAs for their patience in dealing with me.

Last but most certainly not least. 

Jane. Jane has had the distinct displeasure of working with me on two other projects and was dragged into hell again with me for a lucky third. Finally, I got to see her step out from editing and get to writing, in which she amazingly developed Kujo and the MC and brought SO much humour to the game. So many lines made me straight up, cackle out loud. Unfortunately, Jane has to be my friend, as well as my co-writer, so she puts up with a lot, but I think this project has been a blast for both of us. We got to gush about our Scrunkly, Kujo, and just tell amazingly terrible jokes to each other for the past two months. It's been a blast. She's kept me sane and saved me from mental torment on several occasions in regard to this project. You saved our project, we are eternally grateful.

So it's fair to say the team is amazing, talented, and lovely in every aspect. It's a shame none of them are here as I write this for me to give out hugs, forehead kisses, or crisp high fives. Everyone has worked so hard, even in the face of regular life being busy and even life-changing, tragic personal events. I hope you can see every bit of love that has been poured into this game. I hope my anxiety all paid off, and that it was all worth something.

Finally, I get to lay down my director hat, my writer hat. My pin badges for editing, voice directing, audio editing, logo design, marketing, coding, graphic design... you know the drill. Now I'm just a girl (kind of) standing in front of a team, being very humbled and thankful. It's really a labour of love. 

And standing in front of everyone who has loved the game. I am absolutely floored by your response. My heart doesn't have the words <3 

Anyway, I'm reminded of the first devlog I ever wrote, way back for NaNoRenO 2021. I referenced a Disney song and feared The Wrath of the Mouse™. It was Lion King then, but now it's Moana. 

Two months ago I stood nervous and ambitious, thinking to myself: If I go, there's just no telling how far I'll go. Well, I'm here now and I'm forever changed by this experience. The confidence it's inspired in me, that I've proven to myself I can do it.

But also Moana, same girl...

What is wrong with me? 

All my love, 

Olivia (Demi God)